As Time Goes By

Here it is, almost 1 1/2 years after the birth of my angel, and I can say that I KNOW that I am and have healed from things......... I hate the saying "You will get OVER it" cause that just isn't true, HOWEVER, You do get THROUGH it...... something I do continue to say and say to others......

Several weeks ago I went to J's gravesite; because I don't live in the same state, when I do go to that state I prepare myself and make a visit. When I decided to actually drive there, my chest felt hollow. When I got there I felt like I couldn't breathe. As I spent time there, I almost felt like it was a reality show, cause they are so common, however I looked up and knew I was alone, and I was able to pray for my family and my son in peace. Peace and Grace are two things that are hard to come by. Peace by oneself, how often does a mother experience that?? But God's Grace is something I am learning/rediscovering.

I am at a point where I know what direction I want to head, without knowing at all.... if that makes sense..... another child, not another child? I have been more than blessed with a daughter that is soooo AMAZING, and I continue to truly wonder what God's plan is for me.... However, I am still finding and continuing in the faith that He will let me know; Somehow.... LOL.... sometimes I wonder of His messages, but I try so very hard to stay true to what I am "supposed" to do according to His plan, regardless of mine.... WHAT A FINE LINE! Ha Ha.....

Hope this finds everyone well, sure do appreciate all the love and support... still. May His light shine brightly on your day :)